Cold hands, warm shart.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize
