What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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