I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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