There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
