playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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