Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Randomize
