24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize