I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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