it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
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