yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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