my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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