So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
