I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
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