ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I just forgot I was standing up.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Randomize