Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
He shit in the fireplace
Randomize
