Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
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