Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
