Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
OPIZZABONMYDICK
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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