The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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