he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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