God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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