Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
