Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
