Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
