Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
