I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Randomize
