he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
