It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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