i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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