Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Randomize
