At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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