I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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