jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
