Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
