somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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