I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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