ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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