Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize