I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
