dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
