dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Randomize
