Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Is it penis luge time yet?
It's official drugs can't kill me
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
