So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
