I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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