I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
