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i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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