Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
