i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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