Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
