Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize