he thought i was a dude.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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