I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
