Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
